Being there when someone is going…

Last night a friend came over to talk. We talked about her gran who is in hospital after her fourth stroke. My friend has had problems sleeping so I tried to get her mind somewhere else. Afterwards we watched “Freaky Friday” with Jamie Lee Curtis and Lindsay Lohan. We realised that Jake (Chad Michael Murray) was not that good looking after all and actually rather weird…

However, I lost my grandparents quite a while ago. I can barely remember them, to be honest. So I couldn’t really grasp the meaning of my mothers words when she told us they were gone, one after the other. When I was about 6 years old I had no grandparents anymore. They had never been constant people in my life anyway, because we lived in Switzerland and they were in England. We would visit them every year, but my memories of the time are quite vague.

So, I suppose I sort of grew up without grandparents, but on the “up-side” I don’t have to deal with their deaths now.

I was sad when my Guinea-pigs died, when my cat went missing, when we moved the country. But I’ve never had to deal with someone close to me dying. So how do I react when one of my best friends grandmother is in hospital, condition getting worse. A month ago the grandfather of another really close friend passed away and I didn’t know what to say. I guess I tried to cheer her up a little, change her mindset.

I grew up knowing that people live to a particular age and once they’ve reached that age they are quite likely to die and there is little point in hanging on to them.

But I can’t tell someone that who’s about to lose or has just lose someone really close to them.

I suppose I’ll just be there when she needs me. Try to comfort her. But I won’t say much. Because I can’t understand what she’s going through.

 

 

 

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