Habites – Day five

unfortunately today was not a good one. But before I admit to breaking the promise of determination, let me explain.

I have 11 lessons of school on monday. The first two today contained one lovely chemistry test. How it went? Well, I answered every question – the quality of the answers is another matter.

So then I had two lessons of (wait for it, it’s so great I can barely type it) MATHS! I had done my homework for a change – of course it was wrong – but at least I tried.
My maths teacher said he would not explain it since we’d done several exercises just like it already! And there was no further point in explaining.

In the end he did explain it. Not that I understood it, but well, thanks for the effort. We did some more exercises and while we did them (I had no idea what I was supposed to be doing, let alone thinking) I sang an old children’s tune and after that an ABBA song. (“Money, Money, Money”). And then I thought I’d understood something, when I realized I was wrong AGAIN. I felt like crying I guess, because I just laughed. I couldn’t stop laughing. I had tears rolling over my cheeks because I laughed so hard, my stomach hurt from it.

When finally I had calmed down the whole back row was certain: “She’s mad.”

However history wasn’t that bad because we watched a very dramatic film about Napoleon Bonaparte.

Hm, well and in ethics after lunch I realized that a friend of mine is ignoring me. Well, he’s not a friend, but I thought he would be. It’s a shame.

And then I had sport. But it wasn’t all that bad really. We played a game called “ultimate Frisbee” and every time I got the frisbee I squieled (don’t ask me why) and panicked. But I always caught it and passed it on (except one) and when it did fall on the floor I screamed: “NOO!” But the best part was when I threw myself on the floor to catch the damn thing. I DID catch it though, so it was worth it.
Anyway, here comes the sad part (violin music starts to calmly play). Here comes the part where I have to admit to you – and most of all to myself – that I am weak.

Not only did I nibble – I – I – I bit one of my nails. It’s the right thumb and it provokes me still.

I hope you can forgive me.

And as of right now, I need to go look for a nail file or my dear nail is doomed.


May your evening be soft as silk, the night dark as pitch – so that the day may rise up in a new shade of light, one unknown to man, guided by a sun sent to wake the gods of the earth we walk on.



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