Open letter to the NSA

Bomb, al-Qaeda, Boom-Boom, President, Holy War, I know where Snowdon is – Do I have your attention?


Dear NSA,

so, you’re spying on all of us. And on Mrs. Merkel. Was it interesting listening to her make a hairdresser’s appointment?

However, today in class we were talking about the infamous “NSA-affair”, our teacher clearly felt her rights were being compromised and that she’d rather have freedom than safety (that was the discussion we were having).

Myself, I’m not nearly as interested in politics as I should be, in a day and age when change comes even faster through the internet and all sorts. But she is really not a good teacher. She has a voice like an engine.

So however, while we – well, they – were discussing the whole thing, I overheard someone say that the NSA stored twice the amount of files as the national library of the United States in a day.

That’s a lot.

They said you were using it to create a profile of every person – which is really creepy. And yes, that is going way too far! Much.too.far.

But it got me thinking. How do you store all this data? On a server, right? And how do you run this server? Where do you get all that electricity from?

So here’s the deal. You’re not going to stop spying on everybody, I get it, you’re paranoid, you ought to see a doctor – but what you can do is stop killing our planet with your espionage. Put solar panels on every roof of every one of your special spying station, like the one on top of the German parliament building. Find some other power source other than your ego and nuclear power plants to support your evil data gathering. In at least one sense be morally good.

Thank you for your time, you may know classify me as ecologically interested, with a tendency towards eco-terrorism.

Greetings from cold Germany – but you already knew that.


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