My final ball behind me, it has begun to dawn on me. I am never going to see those people again. Those people I spent at least four years with every day except on weeends and holidays – and sick days – are now part of the past. Some of them I will be glad to never have to encounter again, some I will never have known (I’m serious; in four years I never even heard their names until the day we were all given our final reports seperately) and some I really will miss. Others, of course, I have categorized as “friends” and will continue to be bothered by my little self.
Where do I begin? How about the amazing, breathtaking organisational skills my schoolmates have to offer? So, first, to finance the “Abiball” – “Abi” is short for Abitur, which is short for “Yay, now I can act like I know things, yet earn nothing!” – it is the norm to organise “Abi-parties”, where you rent a club and charge people to come in. Our parties were held several months after those of all the other schools nearby and – they were awful. I think I dedicated a blog post to my minor panic attack, trapped between an emergency door that would not open (!) and a door that automatically shut behind you. Secondly every graduating year has a “Abi-Gag”, which is basically an excuse for teachers and students to not do what they are supposed to be doing. We graduates would have occupied the school building, played loud music and what not and forced everybody to join in our “fun games”, whatever they would have been. You can tell by the usage of my dear friend Conditional 2 simple that this fun event did not ever occur. I am not sure why, but ultimately it was because somebody failed to organise it (and we have a seperate committee for everything). Anyhow, what’s next: Paris! Oh my goodness! I love Paris! I do! I do! I love Paris! I am not sure why; yes, it has gallons of monuments and … beige stone…but I think I liked it so much because, even though it is a city full of tourists (Not me, no, no), there was a strange calm that surrounded me as I walked around and could not take my eyes off; thereby walking into several people. The only contra: It is so very expensive to do anything, especially to eat out. And as we had not booked any meal in the hotel we had to eat out. Yet it was a wonderful experience. Unfortunately we failed to visit the insides of the Louvre and we didn’t actually go up on the Eiffel Tower (which was designed by a Swiss, by the way) or – well – go inside the Notre Damme Cathedral. But, we did go inside another cathedral: St. Eustache. Apparently many famous people were christened there, for example, Madame de Pompadour (at the time still Jeanne-Antoinette dePoisson), the future mistress of Louis the fifteenth (I was not sure which one, but I will have to believe Wikipedia on this one), or Richelieu, who, if I remember correctly, was the guy who made French the central and official language for all of France and/or founded l’Academie Francaise which defined rules and such for the French language and today preserves it. Also, Mozart’s mother’s funeral was heald in that church. Wikipedia says it’s a church, though I am pretty sure it is a cathedral. It was massive.. In fact, it had quite the impressive interior, as you can see to your left and to your right. St. Eustache, by the way, was a Roman general who converted to Christianity and was burned along with his family. Charming.
Oh and here’s the thing I could not stop laughing about, though for some reason I was the only one who thought it was funny. So, just as we entered the church, we were all very, very silent and that’s what I was thinking: “Be quiet, don’t make any disturbing noises.” And then Y., one of my good french class buddies, sneezed.
I am giggling right now, writing this. It was hilarious. Everybody was quiet and he: SNEEZED 😀
I had to laugh, very silently, for about 5 minutes and everytime I thought of it, which was often.
Come on, it’s funny!
Now, I may not have travelled very much or very far – the furthest I have been was Madeira, an island off Portugal (apparently we could see Africa, though I could not see anything – or what that Gibraltar?) – but believe me when I tell you that the Eiffel Tower, lit at night, was one of the most beautful things I have ever seen, accomponied by a feeling of peace and beer. I was not even annoyed by the waves of Japonese tourists that were still on the move at eleven at night.
I will not post a picture as you really do have to be there. Of course it was the perfect moment for couples, but I felt quite alright on my own (and in company of my french class buddies, of which two of them said they missed their significant other and the third explained – or attempted to – Einsteins’ theory of relativity, because I had said something about the time-and-space-continuum).
Moving on, that same week we were given our final reports (Abiturzeugnis) in an official fancy dress-up. It was all well and good. I was rewarded for my excellent results in a modern language (english) with a German book on Shakespeare. I clapped a lot and there were a lot of speeces that made little sense. We even had the mayor around for a few words, though they made little sense too. The only good speech was the last one by a teacher who generally holds good speeches on just about anything. The most frequently said things were:
The “Abitur” is the highest degree the German school system has to offer.
The past is not a sofa. It is a springboard.
Well done, you have a lot ahead of you.
And there we all were, clapping, smiling, thinking: You don’t say?!
So, as a joke that everybody approved of, I built it into my monologue at the abiball (the first sentence).
One more thing to this event though: At one point, when there was talk of togetherness and a long way back and a long way ahead, I shed some tears.
I am not sure why. Maybe it has to do with the fact that I never got an official well done in Switzerland. Maybe it was because I was always quite accepted here in Germany – which is good – but it was never that way in Switzerland. Maybe I cried for the time I never felt quite there when I was in Switzerland. Here, people know me. Not because somebody (I know who, but never mind that) told everybody I’d shit my pants during PE and not because I was the weird one nobody had to like. But because I am the crazy, smart one that can actually stand up to people from time to time. The eco-freak, the english girl, the happy one.
I don’t know why – but I cried.
At the abiball I had a ball (ha ha). Our scene which we had put together two days before went well and was welcomed by the audience. Then, it was generally a good program and – this was the biggest surprise of all and I have to say I am a little bit proud of all the attention that came with it – I was – and this was introduced with our year and some may say it has to do the americansation of the world – elected prom queen.
I was elected prom queen.
I did not get a crown, I got a hat, which suited me though and chocolates, which I am eating right now and a plastic medal. In the end I had to dance with the prom king who had no idea whatsoever how to waltz, so he just took my hands, directed me one way and said: Left, right, left, right, left, right – until we ran out of space and had to change direction.
It was only mildly embarassing. But that’s alright, it was also fun. A lot of fun.
Despite my flu-like cold I stayed on and danced to mildly sexist songs with litte content, gladly the DJ later changed it to…my kind of dancing music:
Ahh…and twist we did.
Now things are moving along rather quickly for everyone else. Not for me. My friend R. is going to New Zealand tomorrow. And my friend K. will be departing to Ghana in a few months, assuming it is not forbidden due to the Ebola outbreak.
Lately everbody has been asking what my plans are after school and I usually say: Umm…I will go abroad, then study.
Truth is: I don’t know.
Here are all the things I want to do, but am to chicken and pennyless to pull through:
– Go to New York and work for Marvel Studios on the set of Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
– Work in a theatre in London for a few months
– Travel through Canada
– Travel to Bali
– Do an internships in a film production firm
– Volounteer for a Human Rights organisation
– Tag along with either:
– Ewan McGregor
– Tom Hiddleston
– Lulu Antariksa
or Ingrid Michaelson
And don’t think I haven’t sent Marvel a long E-Mail, trying to convince them to take me on. So far no answer – and that was a while ago.
Who knows what I’ll end up doing. Right now I am working on a new story, my theatre project (though it’s rather tricky to do) and crochet – I am making a cardigan. And it’s thirty degrees Celcius outside. Also, I intend to read “Medea. Stimmen” again by Christa Wolf without being influenced by the interpretations of my German teacher and the need to finish it quickly.
So, that was a brief recap of the last few weeks. At least I know something: People can think I’m beautiful (at least enough to elect me prom queen – might have been the dress though) and I am smart enough for the Abitur, so I can be smart enough for other things in life. Except knitting.